How to Sleep Train your Baby – Baby Sleep Training Methods

The joy of having a new baby is largely unrivalled. You'll probably even be prepared for the prospect of not properly sleeping through the night for the first few months.

But there may come a time when it turns into something less than joyful, or you want some help to sync your sleep cycles with your child's! Heck, plenty of couples' journeys to searching 'how to save my marriage' have started because of sleep deprivation.

It takes a good few months for babies circadian rhythm to kick into gear, and when it does you'll either be really lucky, with a child who takes to day and night time like a pro, or want to help them sleep through the night and stay awake more during the day.

Our circadian rhythm is what helps our body understand when to sleep and when to wake. It can be influenced by a number of factors - predominantly light and dark, but also food eaten, stress levels, our environment and temperature.

With that in mind, sleep training can also be useful to help us! While we can adapt, sleep deprivation is a genuine issue among parents, affecting both our cognitive abilities and potentially creating long-term health issues.

In the UK and US especially, sleep training has become a de facto part of raising a child. It's a relatively new approach to the 'child training' genre but it has rapidly become a useful part of the parental journey.

What is sleep training?

Broadly speaking, sleep training is encouraging your child to sleep through the night. There are several sleep training strategies out there about how best to tackle this, but the most common sleep training methods involve implementing a specific routine or paying closer attention to your baby's tiredness cues.

By doing this, you will (if all goes well) be able to settle when they wake during the night as they learn to self soothe. As a result, the whole family will approach the day in a much perkier state than when their sleep pattern has been disturbed.

Nearly three-quarters (72%) of parents get insufficient sleep three nights a week or more, according to a survey from Sleepopolis, which also show that 8 in 10 of us feel heightened parenting stress when sleep deprived.

There is no right sleep training method. Each baby is an individual, and each parent will approach challenges differently. Indeed, sleep training may not be something you want to do.

The success of many sleep training methods out there relies on anecdotal evidence; there isn't any defined and scientifically accurate way of sleep training infants - it's entirely up to you and your child how to fall asleep!

Some people speak to a sleep consultant if they're having a difficult time getting any sleep training methods to work.

Remember, your sleep cycles are well defined (and possibly have shifted about over the years), but sleep training babies will help them start on a long and happy life of being able to sleep independently.

When to start sleep training your baby

You can't begin sleeping training before about six months. Prior to that a baby's sleep cycle isn't able to support remembering how to sleep through the night, and they have no idea of object permanence so it will have no effect...newborn sleep training is not a thing.

Aside from that, when to start sleep training really depends on your child. You'll be able to make the decision on when to start sleep training your baby based upon your gut. You will likely find this is when they're able to fall asleep independently anyway (without you rocking them to sleep).

By the end of the training, you'll ideally all have healthy sleep habits. Training your baby to sleep is a worthwhile endeavour for everyone in the household.

Generally, sleep training should only take about a week. The younger you start, the quicker it should be. It remains entirely viable to sleep train as children get older, but it will become harder the older they get. Their imaginations start to kick in, and it becomes tougher to break an established routine.

It's tough, because it can be very cute having your child snuggle in with you is wonderful, as long as you can get back to sleep! However that disturbed sleep will likely become a problem the longer it continues.

There is no 'wrong' time to sleep train, but you may find it beneficial to have at least attempted it before they start school.

Sleep training methods

There are a number of various sleep training methods out there for you to try. There will be a bit of trial and error, and a decision on what type of sleep training method you feel would work best in your situation.

While all sleep training options are designed to help the whole family have healthy sleep habits, it can take a while to help baby learn what's going on. There will be lots of time where baby cries, so when you begin sleep training and you think this may affect you, pick a method of sleep training that plays to your sensibilities.

Have a look at the different sleep training techniques on offer and see which one speaks to you.

The Ferber Method

This technique was developed by Dr Richard Ferber, author of the book 'Solve Your Child's Sleep Problems". The Ferber Method revolves around setting a bedtime routine for your child to help them understand that it sleep time.

It's popular as it falls somewhere in the middle of the Cry it Out method and the Check and Console method (which we'll explain shortly), offering a balanced approach.

There are two 'must-haves' as part of the routine. First, there must be a consistent bedtime routine (if you've ever tried to develop habits, it's very similar), so that baby knows it's time for bed and recognises the cues.

Then the second, and key, principle of the Ferber method: putting your baby down while they're awake. Doing this assists them with learning to self soothe and therefore, understand what to do when they experience night wakings. After you've given a kiss and a cuddle and said "good night", you leave the room.

The first few nights of doing this will likely lead to them crying when you put them down or leave. Starting with short intervals, and gradually increasing them - e.g. after 5 minutes, then 10 minutes then 15.

It's important not to pick your child up in these moments, they're to reassure baby that you're still there and it's ok to fall asleep. As the nights progress, you should be able to leave the room sooner and not return as quickly, as they learn to self soothe.

Good to know

With the Ferber method, it's important to be consistent. Sticking to the bedtime routine and creating a sleep schedule is necessary to encourage and assure your baby that everything is ok. It should take just a few days before you can put them down and know it won't take long for baby to fall asleep.

The Check and Console Method

This is very similar to the Ferber method, but encourages a proactive option to stage three. Rather than waiting a set time before baby begins crying, the check and console method suggests checking in and consoling baby before they've started crying.

With this approach, you set up the bedtime routine, leave the room, and then check in a couple of minutes later to offer reassurance, tell then you love them and then leave. As with the Ferber method, you check in again at ever-increasing intervals until baby falls asleep.

Good to know

Anecdotally, this method may take longer as baby may be falling asleep and be happy to see you when you come in, jolting them out of sleep. Eventually they'll learn to fall asleep earlier and earlier.

Cry-It-Out Method (CIO)

One of the most commonly heard of sleep training methods, the cry it out (CIO) method involves putting your child down to sleep and leaving them to cry.

There are misconceptions around this sleep training technique, such as that it's simply popping them in the crib and leaving them to cry until they fall asleep.

The reality is that you let baby cry it out for a few minutes, before comforting them - either by picking them up or gently patting them in the cot. You're merely reiterating your presence in the room.

As with the Ferber method and Check and Console, the aim is to gradually increase the time between visits to encourage them to learn how to self soothe and fall asleep all by themselves.

There is an element of controversy around using this sleep training method, as leaving a baby to cry it out can sound painful and damaging to their emotional or physical health. Rest assured, there are many large sleep training studies that show that letting baby cry for a short period of controlled time is not damaging.

Good to know

It's worth noting that (as with other sleep training methods) most babies will start to show signs of improvement in falling asleep independently within a few days or so.

If you're not seeing a change after a week, then stop, wait a week or two and try again. Either they're not ready for sleep training, or this is the wrong sleep training method for them.

The Fading Method and Chair Method

Very much a gentle sleep training method, this sleep training process is based on the premise of staying in the room until baby falls asleep.

There is the same premise as with all sleep training methods, the bedtime routine plays a key part in helping prepare baby for bed, and helping them develop good sleep habits.

Once baby is drowsy, the parents stay in the room to help baby fall asleep. Every night, you move slightly further away from them, but remaining visible. The aim is to provide comfort and reassurance as they're falling asleep, but not be hands on; let them soothe themselves.

Eventually, it won't take as long for baby to fall asleep, and they'll feel happy.

Good to know

This method of sleep training can be difficult on the parent as it's likely that baby cries as the parent starts to move away. Compared to the other methods, where you can hear the crying but from outside of the room, with the fading method, you're inside the room and will be able to see them as well.

It often takes longer to sleep train with this method, too - potentially up to two weeks, rather than a few nights.

Chair Method

As with the Fading method, this is one of the more gentle sleep training methods. In fact, the Chair method is basically the same as the Fading method but specifies sitting in a chair, rather than on the floor or just standing up.

Gentle Sleep training method

Also known as the 'No Tears' method, this way of sleep training is configured to help baby learn how to get to sleep without crying. It's the only method of all the sleep training programs that places particular emphasis on stopping baby cry, or jumping in as soon as it begins.

The key to this - as with the Ferber method - is a consistent bedtime routine. You need to offer baby healthy sleep habits in order for them to feel comfortable and willing to go to sleep.

This approach tends to lean quite heavily on either the Ferber method or the Fading method - staying in the room, gradually increasing distance, but using physical reassurance rather than verbal, when baby cries. You are there, physically, whenever they cry and until they fall asleep.

Good to know

These gentle sleep training methods can be less stressful, as you don't have to listen to crying as it happens, but there are potential pitfalls to compensate...! It can take quite a lot longer (weeks plural, rather than singular), which can lead to more sleep deprivation as a result.

Transitioning baby to their own room

Experts recommend babies should sleep in the same room as their parents for the first six months of their lives, but after that they can be transitioned to their own room. And there's an argument to suggest that given sleep training usually starts around six months, that the two should go hand-in-hand.

A key factor in baby sleep training is consistency, and helping build effective habits follows a similar methodology, so it makes sense to move them and then start sleep training shortly after transitioning to their own room, rather than starting to train them and then creating upheaval.

Signs your baby is ready

It's certainly not a case of starting sleep training and kicking your baby out of your room the day their turn six months old! Instead, there are certain signs to look out for that indicate your baby is ready to go to their own room. 

They're old enough

The recommended time to sleep train a baby is about six months old - which is also around the time it's suggested to move baby into their own room. This also tends to be the time babies sleep in the cot at night as they've outgrown their bassinet.

There's also evidence to suggest that after seven months, our children become much more attuned to their environment and it may become harder to get them to sleep.

They wake a lot

If your baby is waking more often than just for feeds and needs your help to get back to sleep every time, then moving them out of your room can help.

Your sleep is being affected

Obviously you didn't expect to be fully sleeping through the night, but if they're lost in dreamland while you lie staring at the ceiling because of their snuffles and wriggles, it's probably time to try.

Key things to bear in mind

Now you know when to start moving your baby to their own room, there are a few things you can do to make it a smooth a transition as possible. 

Spend time in the room

Before they spend their first night in their own room, spend some time in there with room so that they are comfortable and familiar with the environment. Make the room feel warm and welcoming so that they feel happy in their new surroundings.

Keep to a routine

If you haven't already created a bedtime routine, now is the time! Routines also help to give baby a feeling of comfort and familiarity. Each of the different sleep training methods recommend consistency and routine as part of an effective transition.

Do it at your own pace

If you want to tie it in to sleep training, do it. If you want to have a gradual move, start by putting baby down for one of their daytime naps to help them acclimatise.

Create the right environment

The nursery needs to be a place for healthy sleep. Experts recommend a temperature of 16-20 degrees celsius. And try to replicate anything from your room - if they had a nightlight or a particular swaddle blanket, make sure they still have those comforts. 

Remember to put a chair in their room if you're hoping to try the chair method, and move any toys out of the way before you start bedtime to prevent accidental squeaks on the way out of the door!

FAQs

Do I have to try baby sleep training?

No, whether you try baby sleep training is entirely up to you. Many parents find it useful to try to help baby sleep through the night, but it's not a mandatory part of raising your child.

How do I know if my baby needs newborn sleep training?

Understanding whether your baby is ready for sleep training is key, because if you start sleep training too early it's unlikely to be a success. Look out for the cues - perhaps their daytime sleep is becoming shorter than usual, or they fall asleep without you rocking them.

How do I know which sleep training method to pick?

Sleep training is dependent upon your parenting style and your child's temperament. The best suggestion would be to see which of the methods we've covered here speaks to your sensibilities, and try it. Baby's bedtime should be a fun experience for everyone involved, so don't add too much pressure on a specific method to work.

Don't expect baby's sleep to improve straight away - all the methods do take from a few nights to a couple of weeks. And if one doesn't work, wait a few weeks to reset and try to sleep train again with another method.

Which sleep training methods are best?

There is no 'best way to sleep train'. The best method is one that you find works for you and your child! We suggest picking one that you agree most with, and trying it for a few nights to see if it makes any difference.

Should I hire a sleep coach or sleep consultant to help with sleep training?

If you're absolutely struggling and your child's sleep habits are driving you, and them, insane, it could be worth speaking with a certified sleep consultant. They will be able to offer some sleep training tips and provide solutions so that baby sleeps soundly.

Is sleep training just letting baby cry?

Absolutely not. While one method to sleep train is called the 'Cry it out' method, it refers to a technique that is controlled and still offers comfort to the baby. Infant sleep training is a defined process that requires effort from the parents.

Is there a difference in sleep training for breastfed and formula-fed babies?

No. Regardless of how you feed your baby, the sleep training approach is the same for all sleep trained babies.

Is sleep training safe for babies?

Sleep training is a valid and useful process for helping babies who are having trouble sleeping. Most babies will be sleep trained at some point to help them develop good sleep habits. There is no evidence to suggest that spending time to sleep train your baby is going to cause any short or long-term issues.

Whereas, there is evidence out there to suggest that sleep depravation can cause many issues in adults..!